Journal Entry

This is actually kind of cool. I wasn't expecting to type up a journal entry. Today is turning out alright, but I guess everything is kind of... boring. Usually at school I have something exciting happen... and ... of course, so far there's nothing.

Instead of doing the whole thing about "baring my soul out" on a piece of paper, I have decided to do something a little different today. Yesterday was the first day all school year so far, that I didn't have homework to do. Yay!!! I don't know how it happened either. I thought that was kind of cool, because I got to mess around with my computer all day, I/m people on AIM, and mess with my blog.

I finally got the music to work!!

Today I'm deciding whether or not to put up Halloween decorations, because I have a lot more homework today than yesterday. The main reason why I'm doing that, is to help my mom out so she doesn't have to all of it. Thinking... thinking... thinking....

I was thinking a lot about random things. Yesterday just seemed like one of those days where you get a lot of inspiration. I realized I have actually began to procrastinate, which I just don't do. It's actually weird to me, to be like that. To top everything else off, I've been sleeping later and later each day, pushing off my DBQ for AP History. I know I shouldn't do that, but I know I have time. Well... at least I think I do. I hope I do.... And if not, I can always make time when I have a couple of minutes here and there. I wonder how much one person can change in ONE YEAR. No, let me refrase that, not one year, but not even a quarter of it. I don't know. This year I have made a huge change about myself and I like it a lot!!

I can't believe that just coming back to school again, walking through the halls again, and having new people as friends, as teachers, can help change the way you think about everything. Now only if I could fix the fact that I get way too stressed..........



Any advice?

Change of Heart

Sorry everyone that's expecting me to post information about my book. Quite honestly, I have changed my mind once again, and I am sorry for doing so. I have been thinking about it and I want my book to stay original, and least known as possible. I'm not sure still if I'm going to get it published, but if I do I want it to be unheard of and new. I'm sorry about changing my mind like this, but if you want to learn about it, don't be afraid to ask. I'll to you as much as you want to know!!! Once again sorry about changing my mind again, but I think it's the best choice.

The Novel-In-Progress

I finally decided whether or not to post my story up. I decided against posting the whole thing. I have had a few people ask me about it, and for those who are curious about it, I will post summaries up of each chapter I have written. Besides not wanting people to know the whole thing, before I get to change parts I don't like or think I could have written better, I have 100 pages handwritten. For me and the way my handwriting is, it will come out to about 1 to 2 pages typed for every page I wrote. So, right now I would be looking at typing about 150 pages, since my book already is in the hundreds. I should have the first post of it up this weekend ( I'll do the summaries by the chapter) and for the title I'll put the chapter number up. And if this ever crosses your mind as a question to ask, I still haven't figured out what I'm going to call the book, and I have not yet even begun to think, how to end it.

Inspiration

Today, during Mrs. Morrison's class I was thinking as I was writing in my journal; why do I personally enjoy poetry writing? The sad part is, that what most people don't realize when you write poetry, it's like you're baring your own soul, for others, your own peers to see. After I spent about seven minutes of the time alotted for our journal writing I thought of a poem off of the top of my head. So... here it is...

Poetry

Poetry is a way to help achieve goals,

By using self-expression,

To bare your own soul,

Show your own obsession!

Let your inspiration go to red hot coals,

Let it teach a lesson,

Not one to be learned,

But a rythm, a flow,

Let you personality show!

I think it's easier to express yourself in a way that not all people will understand. Believe me, I've been writing poetry since I was about ten years-old and when you get yourself to the heat of the moment, whether it being sad, or angry, you have a tendency to write things that are really deep. The only problem with hiding that though, is people in general miss out on really seeing who you are by your feelings, actions, thoughts, and how would anyone learn anything about anyone else without self-expression?

Is DETERMINATION always the best thing?

Have you ever wondered where determination will get you in life?

Well... I have.

I have noticed in the last couple of years I have tried to be perfect in many ways, but determination is the only thing that truly helps me along the way. I can remember last year walking into AP History 1 thinking," I'm going to die by the end of the year." Well now I have a different view on school in general.

I have always been a good student when it comes to academics, but my determination can also be my downfall. Have you ever wanted to do something so bad, and you didn't care what you sacrificed to do so? I noticed in the past year I have learned to deal with stress a lot more, which is a huge feat for me, but that doesn't stop me from getting stressed out to the point where I'm so exhausted that I mentally crash. Every time I feel like I'm going to finally have some time to myself; to hang out with my friends and have some spare time, it seems like something else happens to make that time disappear. So is determination really the best thing, even when it comes to driving yourself crazy?






I think maybe it is. Call me weird, but I think determination is the only thing that truly keeps everyone going. Determination is what makes us do something we want. Determination helps us beat the odds when we believe that there is no hope. Determination helps you accomplish a lot in life. So let me ask you this......




HOW DETERMINED ARE YOU?

A More Recent Poem (What If?)

This is a poem that I wrote right before the end of last school year (May 24, 2006).

What if?

What is a life?

Why do we live?

How do we know it's real?

What if...

We put ourselves through so much,

Like stress,

Each mistake we make,

We feel like less,

What if...

We just lived our life,

Not caring about anything,

Whether it is wrong or right,

But what if...

You care?

What if you have a conscious?

Yourself you scared,

What if...

We were all the same?

Would we all be poor?

Would we all have fortune and fame?

But what if...

It starts with one,

One person caring,

One person's love,

But what if that happened?

What would happen if you did one good deed for someone different each day?

How much of your confidence would you gain?

How many lives would that one good deed save?

What if?

When I wrote this poem I guess I was thinking on how much everyone always stays in the dark about what they truly want. Once they finally find out that one thing that makes them truly happy, it becomes an obsession. They don't realize from always thinking about what they want and how tough their lives are, there is someone else out there who needs attention. So, the next time you think you're live is so horrible ask yourself what if I smiled at one person each day? What if I asked someone what's wrong if they look down in the dumps. What if I did one good deed each day and what if I loved someone as much as I possibly could?